Okay, so maybe the title is a slight exaggeration, but I really like it, so there it is…

I was in Blockbuster the day before Thanksgiving, and by pure coincidence found myself in front of the fitness DVD’s. I say “by coincidence” to point out that I didn’t enter the store with any good intentions about getting in shape. When I was flipping through them I came across the DVD on the left, The Lotte Berk Method: muscle eats fat, which claims “healthy toned muscles will burn calories 24 hours a day – even when you are at rest!” I tell my husband that I wish I didn’t require rest, that I have enough projects going at any given time to occupy me 24 hours a day, so this whole “muscles that work in your sleep” idea really appealed to me. I bought it.

[I should mention at this point that I don’t tend to have weight problems, which unfortunately means I don’t tend to exercise; however, I’m currently 7-8 pounds over my norm and I really don’t like it. Doing something about it is a different story.]

The video is only 30 minutes long, and Lily and I just watched it the first time. It seemed fairly innocuous: no irritating music, and the instructors were pleasant and encouraging. The next morning I began.

“In 10 days you’ll feel the results, in 20 days you’ll see the results.”
Day 1: Exhaustion. There were times when my legs were absolutely shaking from fatigue. When I was finished I slid straight into a hot bath to soak. My husband had gone jogging and I was afraid that I might collapse in the shower if I tried to stand (hence the name of this post) and there wouldn’t be anyone there to rescue me.Day 2: Fear. Arm work doesn’t bother me – I’ve been toting babies for years – but the leg exercises were very difficult for me. The humdinger is something called knee dancing. I am convinced that at some point during this season of 24, Jack Bauer will hold a gun to someone’s head and force them to knee dance in order to extract a confession.Day 3: Stubbornness. I am nothing if not stubborn, and I was angry about that whole fear thing on the previous day. With stubbornness comes determination, which is exactly what I needed.I’ll confess that I did the workout for 5 days, but didn’t integrate it into our schedule once we got back into school. I started doing it again after Christmas, and I’ve hit 21 days now (26 if you count those first 5). They have managed to take a small number of exercises, interspersed with serious stretching, and achieve maximum effectiveness in a short amount of time. I think it would be impossible to do this workout and not see and feel results, unless you were already in good shape. I’m sure I must look just like the picture on the video case now. I can’t take a picture and find out since I don’t have any of those little tiny pink shorts and I’d catch a cold in this weather just taking the picture. Maybe it’s best this way. I know I’m stronger and more flexible, though.

If you’re interested, you can get more information about the complete set of beginner videos through their website. Enjoy!