My mother liked to say that stuff is a good Bible word. Although it sounds casual and not-very-biblical, stuff is found in thirteen verses in the King James Version, such as 1 Samuel 25:13 which says, “. . . and there went up after David about four hundred men; and two hundred abode by the stuff.” When my family sold our home of fifteen years and bought another at the end of November, it revealed a lot about my relationship with stuff, not only the areas where my relationship with it is healthy but also the ways I’ve allowed stuff to become an idol to people or times past.
When my mother, grandmother, and great-aunts all passed away within a short span of years, it felt like the guardians of my family history were gone. I couldn’t rely on my memories alone, so I turned stuff into shrines. Quilts that the women in my family meticulously stitched by hand were put away and preserved as relics of the past. The heavy green crystal goblets my mother used every day of my childhood were carefully boxed and stored in our basement.
I treated family heirlooms as sacred objects instead of enjoying them the way they were intended. The women they represented were no longer physically present in my life and I preserved these objects in honor of their memory. In my desire to ensure no harm would come to my family’s treasures, I guaranteed they could no longer perform the everyday functions for which they were designed.
In addition to stuff with obvious value, I also kept things — for sentimental reasons — that I’m sure the original owners would have already discarded. These objects do not embody my family and compiling junk does not honor them. In our new house, we no longer have a basement, so it quickly became clear that finding a place to store them would be overwhelming (if not impossible) if we want to keep a neat, uncluttered home.
I’ve finally had to face the uncomfortable truth: my shrine of stuff wasn’t a space issue, it was a heart issue. I no longer have room to spare for objects that serve no purpose in our lives. I over-invested in untouchable, earthly treasures for too long.
Visit me today at (in)courage for the rest of the post — feel free to discuss your personal relationship with stuff in the comments section!
Dawn, I am right there with you. My home is filled with objects/papers/clothing/furniture/mounds of “stuff” owned by my beloved grandmothers. I’ve even tried to hold on to items of my husband’s family…all in the name of nostalgia. But it gets to be too much – bits of everyone’s history all plopped into my little house. I love that you are letting go of those things that truly are just “stuff” – and choosing to hold on to the beautiful stories and memories that fill our souls with joy instead.
It’s been surprisingly liberating to let go of things. My mom was very neat—I joked that you could throw a for sale sign in their yard at any given time—and I know she wouldn’t want me to be overwhelmed by her stuff. I will never get rid of those crystal goblets and the family quilts, but I’m not going to keep them in storage anymore. Love you, friend!