This week has been rough. Not only am I battling allergies, but a few days of sleeping with my head propped up by three pillows has left me missing my chiropractor. Let’s just say I’m operating at less than a hundred percent. And everything I touch seems to fail. It’s only Thursday and I’m already stunned at the number of things I’ve messed up this week.
Look out weekend!
This morning when I realized two things I thought I’d done right—good things, intended to be helpful—had flopped, I hit enough of a low point that my kids noticed. Before they left to visit my dad and stepmom, my 18-year-old daughter gave me a 30 second hug and handed me two sheets of handwritten paper. After they left, I had a chance to read it.
The first page contained a list of Bible verses related to peace and trust (John 7:37, John 14:27, Philippians 4:6-7) and the second page began with what I sometimes call my life verse: For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind (2 Timothy 1:7, KJV) and continued with a list how God would meet my fears, followed by a list of my great blessings.
When did my child become so wise? Today it seems our roles reversed.
Raising kids is hard. No doubt. I see friends with little ones or moms trying to survive a trip to the grocery store and wonder how I managed all those years with so many little people. Answer? It was my life. I just did it.
Life stages are different and parenting stages are too.
Sometimes it feels like you’re talking to a wall. Sometimes you want to beat your head against that wall. Is anyone actually listening? If you have the I don’t listen when you lecture (them) / But I’m not lecturing (you) conversation another time you’ll scream.
But sometimes they surprise you, both the big ones and the smalls ones, and meet your weakness with compassion, like today.
So I took a shower, long sniffs from bottles of essential oils known for peace and grounding, and then added the Loyalty blend—because loyalty is one of my superpowers and hopefully something I can’t mess up today—to my diffuser necklace. I love my people and God is good.